Today I want to share with you some valuable information that will definitely change the way you look at your relationship.
The best thing you can do is to find this book and read it: Gary Capman ”The Five Love Languages”
You may not be aware that you speak in one of five love languages and if that is true, you should find it out. And what is more important – you should let you partner know what your love language is because chances are that he speaks completely different language. This is why so many relationships and marriages end… MANY people feel that ”they do so many things for the other person but somehow your partner does not respond or tell you that he does not feel your love”. This is because of your different languages. You have to learn to speak in your partner’s love language. It may be hard for you to understand it, but you will see how your partner changes because he/she feels loved.
We all act differently when our love tank is full. Fill it up!
Hello! Last time I said that I should take more photos. And I did! 🙂 Yesterday I had to go to Ķegums to teach English and in the evening the weather was great. It wasn’t very warm but it was ok, but it was sunny. I got on to the train and to my surprise – it was empty, at least my passenger’s car. It stayed that way for about 15 minutes so I had the time to take some photos.
Empty train ^^
These flowers are amazing. I hope they will grow more in the forest and maybe then I could use them in our wedding 🙂
Anyway.. I was just listening to music, singing along (lip sync), and appreciating everything I have in my life! 🙂
I think I am ready today for a longer post than lately ;D
You can put this in the background.. 😀
First of all, in my last few posts I have been talking about my depression, my illness and the fact that I don’t want to study.
Well, for more than a month (If I’m correct) I no longer study at Riga’s Technical University. It may sound bad but I have good news – It doesn’t to me! 🙂 I feel much better now that I have time for myself, for my thoughts, my health and also God. It is the hardest decision I have ever made because it is not what everybody would do and also a lot of people may simply not understand this because it seems not mainstream. And it definitely isn’t. But.. It was MY DECISION (I don’t scream it out loud with anger, I say it with rather smile on my face) and that is what I needed – A path of my own. It didn’t seem right.. and it was enough for me to stop and think about this. I prayed God to help me deal with this.. and He did help me. My mother and my whole family, in fact, supported me (which was very important) because it would be very hard to live my life knowing that they are disappointed or somehow unsatisfied. I did it and I don’t regret it. 🙂 I have time to see what is happening around me and I can hear my heart telling me the things I love. It feels like a blurry picture that is being clarified. 🙂
So some of you may ask – what are you doing then? What is your daily routine?
Well, first of all, my aim wasn’t to jump from one stressful routine to another. I just wanted to have a STOP.. to have the chance to look at my life and see where I am going with this and why I am loosing my mind over something. But in the meantime I didn’t want to do absolutely nothing. So I find my own pace of doing things. So now I continue to work as a English home teacher and I have seriously taken on learning Norwegian. And while we’re on the subject.. I had an idea to post grammar and other things I learn here and put it under ”Norvēģu valoda (NORSK)” category but I won’t do it unless there are few people that really want me to do that. So this one is up to you. Leave your opinion in comments or write me personally. 🙂 Okay.. so what do I do other than this? I enjoy the ”little things” in life. I put it in quotation marks because I actually things of them as the the Big and Important things! ^^ Things as helping my parents, seeing my friends, playing with our dog and cat, loving my soon to be husband and praying.. a lot.
Today I had the first experiment with my wedding hairstyle. Agita (our wedding organizer and hopefully Kaspars’s brother’s girlfriend) recommended me Agnese (the hairdresser) and today we met. We bought some daisies (not real of course) and white pearls.. also black metal wire for my hairstyle. So we made curls and then we just tried different things. But I really liked that we put 3 daisies in the back (all hair are basically down) and we made like .. strings with white pearls that came from the daisies as if they were little stars. I won’t have wedding veil so we wanted to make something nice ourselves. I would put some photos but I still have the feeling as if I should wait until the wedding is over ;D Sorry! 🙂 We will meet again on the 25th of April to dye my hair and then on the 28th of April to have the last experiment for hair and also to put the make up on and see how it looks.
I have not been to classes for more than a week now. The thing is that I really don’t want to. First of all, I’ve been fighting depression for a few years now and every time it comes back, it gets stronger – that’s a proven fact.. So I simply don’t want to stare at how I destroy my life and relationships with other people.. So I surprisingly took my first step – I found an audio book about depression and it is called ”The Mindful Way Through Depression’‘. I am in the middle of the book now. It really made me look at depression from completely different point of view.. but what helped me even more.. was doing the things I want. I stayed home, I helped Kaspars, I took on embroidery, wrote blog, visited my parents and enjoyed the nature. These are all the things that I WANTED TO DO. So I did, and I felt happy again. When I feel depressed it isn’t just unhappy.. it’s even worse – I don’t care about the things I should. I simply don’t want to exist.. It destroys everything! When I look at my life I understand that everything is great and I should be the Happy Carrot, but I can’t make myself feel that way. It’s sad and unfair.. especially to Kaspars. This is why I can’t go back to doing those things that make me feel miserable and my life – pointless. And I mean.. I don’t see how the bachelor’s degree can get me a job and make me happy. It can’t! Because if I really want to learn programming.. I should start doing it by myself. But all I can think of is ” what will my parents say? What will my friends say?”. I can make my own decisions but I am afraid to make a mistake as we all are..
But then again – what mistake? The biggest mistake is to waste your time on the things you don’t want to do. When my parents are gone and friends living their own lives… there won’t be anyone judging me except myself – I will be judging myself for the things I didn’t do. I have different values in my life – money definitely isn’t the first one.
I want to be happy, alive and energetic. I want to find a way I can feel happy. I want to do the things that help me and my family. And I want that ”doing” to help other people. I want to live and never regret anything. I want to experiment with my life by following my heart.